i’ll be good like i know i should

Unfortunately over the course of my lifetime I’ve always tended to be somewhat too disorganized.   Jo Anne, one of my oldest friends from Jackson Heights, reminded me a while ago that when we were kids in St. Gabriel’s she and my other friends from our neighborhood used always to have to wait an inordinate length of time at the end of each school day for me to get ready so we could go home.   For as far back as I can remember I’ve always been a bit on the sloppy side.   I’ve also tended toward a lifelong habit of procrastinating.    When I was in school, though, I always made sure I got all my homework and studying done and everything was handed in on time.   As an adult at work, at each job I’ve ever gotten, I’ve also done things the same way.    It takes a lot more effort and concentration, though, for me than for just anyone.    One good habit I’ve always adhered to is my compulsive punctuality.    To my sorrow I’m absent minded.   Although I can remember entirely unnecessary things from decades into the past, as well as all sorts of profound abstract intellectual concepts, I frequently forget unavoidably necessary things that must be done right away.   In order to avoid any more trouble than necessary, I’ve done absolutely everything I possibly can to develop certain good habits.   I always try to put everything I need, in advance, into a certain place, and to make sure it’s in listt-bprecisely the same place each time, in order that I won’t ever have to be bothered with wondering, at the last minute, where I may have left it.   It’s very easy for me to lose track of things.    I’m simply not the type of individual who can get away with letting his guard down.    I also make sure I specifically write things down whenever necessary.   I do this because if I leave it up to my memory to keep track of all the details I have to deal with, I shall have nothing but trouble to show for it.   I always make sure I go to bed very early at night and get up very early each morning in order that I can count on having a clear head during my day.     When I was a kid in school my teachers always said that when a student took notes it helped him to remember the subject matter better than if he merely trusted his memory.    There have been quite a lot of studies done that have proven that this is a fact.   As far as I know I must always have done something right because I’ve never gotten into a significant amount of trouble, either in school or at work.   I’ve even occasionally been commended for above average performance.  My problem is not that I’m thoroughly lacking in a sense of responsibility.   It’s that I’m naturally prone toward carelessness, inattention to detail, and other bad habits and must put up quite a fight against those character defects.




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